nu nii ei tule enam
tahaks öelda aga ei tea mida
ei tea kuidas
kas üldse
kas siis selle maa keel?
oh jah see vist oli juba
laulaks siis proteiinilaulu
see on parem kui rasvalaul või süsivesikute laul
vitamiinilaulust rääkimata
kord me liigutatud saame
kord me liigutatuks jääme
kord otsa saab kord
ma hajume taas proteiiniks ja huumuseks
ilma nimeta mänguks
ilma võimeta nime panna
kord läheb teele ja tagasi ei tule
aja hajumise tagumises otsas ootab meid ees kohustuslik kamikazemisjoon
rammida olematust omaenda kehaga
külma ja võõrandumust
isikliku ihuga
seni veel jõuab armastada tahta loota ja igatseda
küünarnukkidega annab ka endale küünra võrra vabadust hankida
või misasi see ikka on
mingi isiklik koherentsus väikene vastavus
nagu omakootud käpik
päikesekiir sees
üksainus neile kahele ühekäelisele mehele kes on lõkke ääres
kordamööda kanda
fantoomvalude leevenduseks
annab armastada
armas
isikliku ihuga
pateetikat on vähe vahel
kas midagi jääb ehk veel üle või puudu
ma ei tea
nendest vahtraninadest mis must mutimullahunnikutes võrsuvad enne kui tuleb neilegi oma luider rohumees järele
ah et isiksuse kordumatus läheb vahepeal kaduma
isikliku iha ruum
eneseteadvus häädus kurjus eetika
paha lugu siis küll
äng tuleb kohe südamesse
kas tuleb veel kohustuslikke harjutusi
vigade tegemisi või parandusi
kohustuslikke rivistusi
joondu valvel
rivitult
või on täitsa paras
mina ei tea aga lootust mul on
ergastatud epitaafide järele
olen mõnda vahel kinni jäänud
olen vahel mõnest lahti öelnud
miks – ma pole öelnud
hoian ikka endale hoian ikka endale
minu ülesanne – see on kaasa tunda
see on suur missioon suur misjonikäsk suur misjonihirm suur misjoniarm
minna kõike maailma
ja hajuda ja hajutada
kõrvad katta siis kui õues undab
ei termilisele terrorile
jah dünaamilisele dünamiidile
lennata külmusesse
lend
end
ikka veel annab armastada
omaenda ihuga
annab tunda
tund
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